Cheaters Never Win

When I was in the first grade I made a choice that has haunted me for over two decades. My teacher, Mrs. Browning, would give a spelling pre-test on Wednesdays. If you got 100% on the pre-test, you didn't need to take the actual test on Friday. I always got 100% on the pre-test. Always. During one pre-test towards the end of the year I couldn't remember if the word yellow was spelled with one "l" or two. I knew that all the colors were written on posters that were hung on the ceiling. I had a perfect record of 100% pre-tests on the line. What would I do? I looked at the color posters. The minute I did it I felt horrible. My guilt was compounded when Mrs. Browning announced that I was the only student who received 100% that week. As a reward she bought me a bag of popcorn. I never got up the nerve to tell her that I cheated, and I have felt horrible about it ever since. Now, with this background, you might be able to understand my over-reaction to poor Dude's recent spelling test.

Dude brought home a spelling test with a 96%. Good, right? Only I know that he knows how to spell all the words. As I examine the test, I notice the word "bat" circled in red. It was spelled correctly so I couldn't figure out why he had missed it. Then it occurred to me that bat wasn't one of the spelling words. When I asked him why he spelled the wrong word he explained that he had accidentally written one of the words on the wrong line. During the time he was erasing and re-writing the word on the correct line the teacher had moved on to the next word and he wasn't sure what it was. So, he decided to look at one of his classmates tests to see what the word was. At this point in the story I began a crazy lecture about how cheaters never win. I won't give the lecture, but I will say that I will be very surprised if poor Dude ever looks at another child's paper again.